Welcome back!

Amazing Me!

Like the rest of you, I’ve kvetched about being fat all my life. I’m hyper-sensitive about “things fat.” So  last week, in the midst of my Memorial Day holiday, somewhere I heard a question asked about another topic and I turned it into the title of this Blog Post. I think it’s very, very important for all women of size to answer.

Who did I become BECAUSE I was fat? I’m just going to make a list here for you of what I have unfolded in my life due to being obese. None of these is a bitch nor is any one a brag. They are all statements of fact about who I have become courtesy of my cross to bear.

· I know that I am 100% capable of self-sufficiency.

· I know that while I might whine initially, very soon after the whine, I own whatever is making me uncomfortable, dissatisfied, angry, or off-kilter in some way and I fix it.

· I am enormously grateful for the innumerable blessings in my life. I have two friends who spent this holiday with me doing handyman work after driving six hours to get to my house, and two wonderful relatives who tried to do the same while sick but had to leave. Amazing!

· I know that I am resourceful and can find dozens of ways to resolve a need or a problem.

· I am generously in love with my Self due to my understanding of my nature.

· I have great wisdom, true brilliance and the willingness to help most others if I can see they make the effort to help themselves.

· I have a long, long list of skills and talents.

· I have a deep-seated sense of real spirituality. I thrive on Truth, Beauty, and Goodness.

· I am very quick witted. You have to be when surfer dudes yell “No Fat Chicks!” You have to react fast to smack them upside their heads when all you’ve got is words.

· I am a deep, deductive reasoner. The enjoyment at the end of this process is exhilarating.

· I have learned acceptance is the most practical form of love. I no longer try to change anyone. I accept them “as is” because they are just perfect “as is” to my eyes.

· I know that generosity generates and I enjoy being generous.

· I can manifest whatever I strongly desire using my mind alone.

· I adore being alive. I’m not planning to die any time soon. 126 is my goal.

I don’t want to think up any more. That’s enough. Not a bad cross for this fat girl to have had to carry, eh? I’m pretty happy with what I have unfolded. The payback isn’t always a bitch. I know that by persevering to love and accept yourself, you will. I’d like to help you do that. My book would be a boon and a blessing and get you on the right path.

Love,

Pat

Pat & Percy & Chi

These are the Cats Who’ve Seen Me Naked.

I’m rather fond of them.  Percy is sleeping beside me in my Inbox as I write this blog. They are loving, accepting, non-judgmental friends. They frequently treat me better than some of the members of my family!  What’s not to love?

I was challenged by a mentor this week to answer the questions: How is your fat helping you?  How has fat become your friend? She asked me because of my tendency to plateau. I think what’s going on is that I’m getting closer and closer to the completion of this challenge to govern my body through purely mental means.  I have made much progress - minus 35 lbs since last Fall. I keep hitting these plateaus so for me it means, I’m blocking my progress through fear in some way.  So I’ll answer the questions.

When I first began this exercise, I noticed that my thinking turned first to talking about the mistake, like this: my fat is a comfortable and uncomfortable accustomization.  It is a way for me to continue to think poorly of myself, to denigrate my godliness.

I stopped myself and repeated the original question:  How is your fat helping you?  And I came up with these:

• It keeps me warm
• It lets me see and love what is round vs. what is flat.  I don’t like flat or emaciated thinness.
• It gives me big boobs.
• It lets me feel okay about speaking the truth with candor
• It makes me feel powerful, as in, there’s “a lot” backing up my words

I think there is probably more in there, and I haven’t permitted myself the time to go look.  I will.  I encourage you to answer this incredible question too.

And now, a word from someone who deserves recognition.  I joined a Ning site yesterday that is all about Transformation. I think it’s a great place to explore ideas, one of my favorite hobbies.

Love,

Pat

You’re going to have to put up with baby pictures for a while. This new grandbaby of mine is a major source of inspiration. I do believe the experiences of our lives contains all the tools we need to progress. We do, however, have to tune in to them. When I thought about an inspiration for you today, innocence came up.

Innocence

When you look at an innocent infant, and you realize that you once were one, you know that at one time in your life you did not think that you were fat, or chubby, overweight, or obese.  Somehow, someway, that idea was introduced to you.  And you innocently accepted the fact that it was true, whether it was true or not.  In my case, I accepted it and it was not true.  As a baby, I was normal sized, but because I got nicknamed Patty Fatty, there was never a time in my life when I didn’t think I was fat.

Did something like this happen to you? I flashed back on a memory I have of trying to explain my largeness to a group who hoo-hawed the idea that my parent’s influence had anything to do about it. I remember leaving the group with a face burning with anger, and now that I’m writing about this for you today, there IS some blame there.

I know that my grandbaby, as with all children, will undergo the influence of his parents, as I did mine, as my kids did, as you did. And we all survived.  We can go back and correct the ideas we once thought were true.  They might be more compounded as we add to them in our own growing up process.  I know that I added a whole lot of details about food being fattening and about exercise being necessary, neither one of which is really true, or we’d all be obese and we’re not.  I mean, a law is a law, right?  And if it’s not a law, then it’s just an individual belief - and a wrong belief for this obesity concept.

If  you can begin to think like a newborn and simply enjoy the food you eat without adding all other kinds of things - like ideas about weight gain - your life would be more pleasant.

Love,

Pat